Bitter sweet

October 5, 2019 will always be known as a very very bitter sweet day for us and all our volunteer staff.

Sweet as this was our annual open day and bitter as we had to farewell an animal so important and dear to us.

Firstly, the open day was another huge success. On this day we open our gates to all visitors so they can meet the animals they have become so enamoured with online and also speak with us about rescue and the plight of our animals and rescue animals in general. Of course, an open day wouldn't be complete without gorgeous food, drink, kids entertainment and a familiar joyous atmosphere. Many of the visitors on an open day comment to us during and after how much they simply enjoy the atmosphere at a Furever Farm event. Everyone is there for the same reasons, have similar thinking and morals and everyone just gels in what is a comfortable setting. Some people even come simply to meet with friends and spend the whole day enjoying the farm.

This year saw us invite a new bunch of food vendors and we are so thrilled with how they went and the positive feedback we received. Ice cream masters Live A Little Gelato were so welcomed especially with their scrumptious "ice cream cookies". On a rather warm day these were well received as they are at any event they sell at. The team from Live A Little also sold pastries from Continental Bakery and this was even our first tasting of these lovely vegan treats. We were impressed and hope to have them back next year. Also Liv and her husband took care of a fantastic vegan barbecue that went down a treat with all and basically near sold out during the day. Cakes were supplied by the fabulous Sparrow & Spoon cakes and, again, were tasted by us for the first time. OMG!!! These are absolutely amazing! This small business run by Sheridan is still taking off but we feel that with further exposure this is going to be big! Truly, no exaggeration, they are to die for and there is no question that we will have Sheridan back next year....if only to feed us for the day! Again our hot and cold coffee was taken care of by Paul from Booknook & Bean. Paul was at our open day as a vendor last year and was happy to return this year. As per usual he was a big hit. Paul's coffees hit the spot either hot or refreshingly cold! It goes without saying that we want Paul here again for our next day. We also had more of the fabulous vegan organic bread supplied for sale by Shannon and Vyk of Mylor Bakery. No preservatives and totally vegan this bread always flies out especially with a lot of the vegan community knowing of Mylor Bakery. Shannon and Vyk are the nicest people and this is the second year they have donated 50-60 loaves for us to sell and raise funds with. Tasty biscuits and sweets were donated by the lovely Sarah Huxtable and were used in raffles and fundraising activities. All vendors expressed at the end of the day how happy and impressed they were and their wishing to return next year! We cannot thank them enough for their generosity, skill, product and attendance. We must say, also, that all of our volunteers for the day did an amazing job. Volunteers are not given near the exposure and respect they deserve, we feel, and we like to make sure that we thank our vollies wholeheartedly. You guys are amazing and we simply could not do it without you. We had vollies manning paddock gates and taking care of entrants telling our animals stories as people ventured in. Vollies manning and collecting entrance fees at the open gate, selling merchandise and products at our stalls and even driving the great "Fergie" towing kids around the farm with excited exuberance! Fergie is our old 1950 Massey Ferguson tractor and makes it's appearance every open day giving little and big kids hay rides during the day. Our driver Paul was as bigger kid as those in the trailer keeping everyone entertained as well as guiding Fergie with loving arms.

Finally we had many kids running around, faces painted in incredible animal designs thanks to our wonderful face painter for the day, Dan E Veeki! Such a great talent and amazing with the kids as they lined up for her expertise all day.

Yes, the day was a success. From a financial perspective it was good and we are simply happy to break even, which we did. When you factor in things we had to buy and repair prior to the day, goods, food, drinks and wanting to keep everything affordable for visitors, not over charging on things, we did ok. The main priority for us is that we can educate some on the need for rescue and the shortfalls these animals are subject to while providing a nice fun day. Money is sadly an important part of rescue but there are also some things that at equally as important and valuable, that being seeing people enjoy these wonderful creatures and the next generation appreciating them as the sentient beings they are.

There was one other expense that we needed to cover both from prior to the day and following immediately after. Vet expenses. A cost that is simply unavoidable in rescues and sanctuaries. We never complain of vet fees so long as they are being issued by a good, honest vet and our animals are receiving the treatment they require. Sometimes, sadly, despite all veterinary efforts and all the positive love directed, success is not able to be achieved.

This brings us to the bitter part of the day.

On the same day that we were all having a great time at the farm there was an animal within that we were always checking in on, taking time to monitor and provide care in amongst trying to keep our minds on the job of the open day. Some of you may have seen this animal alone in the lambs yard, or sick bay* as is needed. A very special animal to us and to several of our longer term volunteers was inside and, after vet treatment earlier in the morning, was trying his hardest to overcome an ailment inflicting discomfort and, eventually, pain.

Toby was our third ever animal on the farm way back when we first started taking animals in. An orphaned Damara sheep he blew the myth that is "grumpy Damaras" right out of the water. Bottle fed by us here and raised by us and Maggie, our since fallen mother sheep, Toby was the epitome of happiness and goodwill. Never a sheep have we met that was so gentle, loving and accepting. We had a name for Toby that read "the sheep that never stops smiling". This was not only fitting but absolutely true. ALWAYS when you would see Toby he would have that upward smile coming from his little mouth whilst he beamed towards you with the most gentle and beautiful eyes. He simply was LOVE. Toby grew up as part of the seven sheep that were all initial to us at Furever Farm. He would live his life in the Daisy May Paddock where he would share his space with his fellow sheep, horses, ponies, a donkey and cows. He loved each and every one of them and Toby would not harm a fly. He had a special friend and bond with little Nelly, the Dorper sheep that was so small in stature but super in cuddliness and cuteness. Her and Toby would become inseparable and would never venture far from each others side and eyesight.

Toby was found "down" the day before our open day, October 4. Down is a term used to describe a sheep that has fallen and is motionless on their side. Most will know that sheep are ruminant, that they cannot spend a lot of time on their sides and if they do there is generally something wrong with them. Laying on their side for too long is deadly. We were lucky to be scanning the paddocks, something we do throughout the day and especially during morning rounds, and Toby was found. Quick efforts enabled Toby to be up righted and immediately he was taken into the little lambs yard where we could monitor him closely. We noticed straight away that Toby was groaning and his stomach bloated. This is not to be confused with "bloat" that occurs mainly on the upper left side of a sheep when they are, actually, suffering bloat. Toby was just incredibly round. We called our fabulous vet Bec Dunn of Windrush Vet to look at our boy straight away. We cannot recommend Bec enough. We have been using Bec for a while now and we simply cannot put a negative word against her name. She is wonderful in all that she does for us and is caring and compassionate towards these animals, animals that are rarely seen by vets and rather "disposed" of by farmers in house. Bec is professional and her knowledge of these animals is second to none.

Upon examination by Bec it was determined that Toby had two things being caused by one or the other. He had either a large mass of 'food' caught in his abdomen which was preventing him from defecating and urinating OR he had bladder stones, crystals that form in the bladder or urethra which block urine and his swollen bladder had also blocked possible motion from his bowel. It was suspected that Toby had been this way for at least 24 - 48 hours and was now struggling and becoming stressed. medication and painkiller was administered and the next morning, after zero response, Bec returned to us on the morning of the open day to administer further treatment. All possible treatment was given and a timeframe of 12-24 hours given for Toby to improve. Should no improvement be forthcoming in this time it was unlikely that it would and Toby would be in very dangerous territory.

We did not get to the 24 hour mark. The open day came and went with us monitoring Toby throughout the day. No urine passed nor and faeces and Toby was simply tired, in pain and very ill. Every bit of time allowable had been given, every bit of treatment and medication had been administered and Toby, unfortunately, did not respond. It is one of the hardest places to be caught in seeing your animal suffer, not wanting them to suffer BUT wanting to give them every chance. During the day Toby had "grown" again, his poor body swelling and becoming so tight. The hardest phone call was made not long after gates were shut on October 5. Descriptions were given to Bec over the phone and it was agreed that we didn't want Toby to continue to suffer when so evident that no cure was coming. Sheep do not handle anaesthetic well at all with only a narrow percentage chance of them living through it let alone an operation that would see Toby cut open, his bladder cut open and removed of stones and his gut cut open and cleared. There was also the distinct possibility that Toby would literally pop inside. Bec returned to Furever Farm for the second time on the same day and upon looking at Toby acknowledged his "growth" and his obvious pain.

Have you ever held your animal in your hands and tried to comfort them, to take away their suffering? You look into their eyes so deeply with yours, through tears, and you know that they are telling you something. Telling you that it is alright, that they love you, that they understand and they just want you to end the pain. Our eyes were telling each other a story. They were "speaking" for the last time. As Bec prepared a sedative and euthanasia shot you try to grab every last second of time you can to love your dear friend. In the end you cup your boys head in your hands and you whisper to him you love him, that you're sorry and you carry him to sleep as he is laid to rest. Toby was pain free and comfortable on the evening of October 5. This open day will remain in our minds and hearts for as long as we shall live.

We laid Toby down and just spent time hugging him and crying oh so many tears. Tears of sadness, tears of disbelief, tears of acknowledgement that we had had nearly three years with this special boy and that, again, another was robbed of much more life. We covered Toby and his burial took place the next day where he now lays in his favourite spot in the Daisy May Paddock. We cried for several days in remembrance, we cry as we write this. We are, however, so much richer than any millionaire imaginable having been blessed and changed by such a wonderful boy. Your smile will be etched in our minds always Toby, how could we ever forget it. Your presence will be in our hearts permanently Toby, there is no other place for it. You will be in our lives until we join you Toby, how could we ever deny it.

Bitter sweet. It is used to describe an occasion or event that, despite it's enjoyment and success, is overtaken by sadness and loss. We love our open day......but we love our animals more.

*Furever Farm desperately needs a proper sick bay come stable. If you can help please contact us and help build "Toby's Bay".

TOBY

You joined our lives so tiny and sweet,
Never a more beautiful soul could we ever meet.
You uplifted our life and delivered joy,
Oh my what a gorgeous boy.
We fed you and loved you through your infancy,
You gave your love back to them, us and me.
You roamed our vast paddock as part of your flock,
Each and every day smiling around the clock.
Your happiness spread infectiously through,
Each friend and family who stood beside you.
Your bond with little Nelly was as strong as with us,
You cared for her heart like heaven above.
Your nature was loving so gentle and sweet,
We longed for our days with you as we meet.
Your soul was uplifting should ever we need,
Your love captured us, our souls it did feed.
But now you are gone sweet Toby our love,
We look for your shadow as if from above.
There are no words strong enough to describe our loss,
We love you today even though you are lost.
We will never forget you our sweet gentle boy,
Our lives are enriched, all from your joy.
We remember you fondly as happiness should,
If we could bring you back, believe me we would.
We now sit at your grave and our eyes they still weep,
Rest easy now beautiful in gentle sound sleep.

RIP TOBY.

Words by Darren Appleby.

Darren, Hayley & all the Furever Farm team.